Intoxication means she can't legally consent, NOT that she's an easy score." Or maybe you recall sharing my personal favorite, "Your sexual experiences don't dictate your worth just like a woman's sexual experiences don't dictate hers." Last but not least, do you remember calling your son out when you discovered he was using the word "slut" liberally?
Or when you overheard him talking about some girl from school as if she were more of a conquest than a person? By contrast, here are some conversations you might have a better recollection of.
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A constant loop played inside my head: “You’re stupid, you’re disgusting, you’re a slut.” I buried the pain I felt into the darkest corner of my soul, but still, the memory of him—of his hand on the back of my head, pushing—has stayed with me for years, following me like a second shadow, waking me in the night, stealing my breath. I’ve forgiven him—not for his sake, but for mine, so that I could finally allow the angry, puckered wound the assault left inside me to soften and heal.
Still, I have thought about him over the years, wondering what it was that allowed him to think what he did was okay.
I only endured, waiting for the pain and paralyzing terror of what he was doing to loosen its vice-like grip on my chest.
How about the heart-to-heart where you lovingly conferred the legal knowledge that "a woman doesn't have to be fighting you and you don't have to be pinning her down for it to be RAPE.
The one where you said, "I love you and I need you to know that no matter how a woman dresses or acts, it is not an invitation to cat call, taunt, harass or assault her"?
Teenagers, (An open letter.) Remember that intimate conversation you had with your son?
When you dress that way, some people read it as an invitation." "Never go out alone, never walk alone at night, never drink from an open beverage." These are conversations often had by loving parents like you.
They come from a place of care, they come from a place of concern but most notably they come from a place of upside-down, cultural indoctrination that is hurting, stifling and punishing young women.